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Midnight Bugs taste Best
Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they CAN hold everything you need.
Wear Heavy Boots. You can’t kick things when you’re wearin’ sneakers
NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench
If you’re a complainer, ride at the back of the pack so you won’t contaminate the rest of the group.
Never try to race an old Geezer, he may have one more gear than you.
The size of the PISTON don’t tell you nothin’ about the DEPTH of the stroke.
Home is where your bike sits still long enough to leave a few drops of oil on the ground.
You’ll get farther down the road if you learn to use more than two fingers on the front brake.
Routine maintenance should never be neglected
It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.
The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rearview mirror.
Never be afraid to slow down.
Only Bikers understand why dogs love to stick their heads out car windows.
Bikes don’t leak oil, they mark their territory.
Never ask a biker for directions if you’re in a hurry to get there.
If it take more than 3 bolts to hold it on, it’s probably crucial.
Anything that shows up on more than 2 bikes is a FAD.
Remember that you will be judged by the Horse you rode in on.
Don’t ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise.
Pie and Coffee are as important as gasoline.
The number of kicks it takes to start your bike is directly proportional to the number of spectators.
Never ask your bike to scream before her throat is good and warm.
Sometimes it takes a whole tankful of gas before you can think straight.
If you want to get a job, you may have to compromise your principals, you may even have to shave.
Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you’ll ride alone.
Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.
Never mistake Horsepower for staying power.
A good rider has balance, judgement, and good timing. So does a good lover.
A cold hamburger can be reheated quite nicely by strapping it to an exhaust pipe and riding forty miles.
Never do less then Forty miles before breakfast.
If you don’t ride in the rain-you don’t ride.
A bike on the road is worth 2 in the shop.
Respect the person who has seen the Dark side of motorcycling and lived.
Young riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go.
Overconfidence can be supplied by spare spark plugs, a set of wrenches, and a roll of toilet paper.
Never offer to fight an OLD geezer. If you win, there’s NO glory. If you Lose, your reputation is shot.
A good wrench will let you watch without charging you for it.
Advice is free and worth every penny.
Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.
Always back your scoot into the curb-and sit where you can see it.
Work to ride-Ride to work.
Whatever it is, its better in the wind.
Two lane blacktop isn’t a highway-its an attitude.
When you look down the road, it seems to never end-but you better believe it does.
A biker can smell a party 5,000 miles away.
Winter is Natures way of telling you to polish.
A motorcycle can’t sing on the streets of a city.
Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.
People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.
More races were won in the tavern than on the track.
Never loan your bike to someone else, and never ride another’s.
If the bike ain’t braking properly, you don’t start by rebuilding the engine.
Motorcycling is a giant game of Mines Bigger than yours!
Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor.
Sometimes the best communication happens when you’re on seperate bikes.
Well-trained reflexes are quicker than luck.
Good coffee should be indistinquishable from 50 weight motor oil.
The best alarm clock is sunshine on Chrome.
Learn to do counterintuitive things that may someday save your butt.
The twisties-not the superslabs-seperate the bikers from the squids.
Beware the biker whose ink peels off.
New leather don’t smell right.
When you’re riding lead--don’t spit.
If you really want to know what’s going on, watch what’s happening at least 5 cars ahead.
Don’t make a reputation you’ll have to live down or run away from later.
If the person in the next lane at the stoplight rolls up the window and locks the door, support their view of life by snarling at them.
Smoke and grease can hide a multitude of errors, but only for so long.
A friend is someone who’ll get out of bed at 2am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you’re broken down.
If she changes her oil more than she changes her mind--follow her.
The thicker your oil, the hotter you can take it.
Catchin a June bug @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary.
If you want to get somewhere before sundown, you can’t stop at every tavern.
There’s something ugly about a NEW bike on a trailer.
You can always hear a classic open primary-it sounds like $1.34 in change is loose in the friction plates.
Hunger can make even roadkill taste good.
You gotta be smart enough to understand the rules of motorcycling, and dumb enough to think the games important.
Don’t lead the pack if you don’t know where you’re goin’.
If you leave without one of your group, you better hope he doesn’t catch up at the next stop.
Sleep with one arm thru the spokes and keep your pants on.
Practice wrenching on your own bike.
Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don’t. Some can’t.
Three things can’t be trusted: a fart, a cook, and a rear view mirror.
Beware the biker who says the bike never breaks down.
Some bikes run on 99-octane ego.
Owning 2 bikes is useful because at least one can be raided for parts at any given time.
You’ll know she loves you if she offers to let you ride her bike. Don’t do it and she’ll love you even more.
Don’t argue with an 18-wheeler.
Don’t lean on the horn ’til you’re out of danger. Then blast it for all you’re worth.
Never be ashamed to unlearn an old habit.
Maintenance is as much art as it is science.
A good long ride can clear your mind, restore your faith, and use up a lot of gasoline.
If the countryside seems boring, stop, get off your bike, and go sit in the ditch long enough to appreciate what was here before the asphalt came.
If you can’t get it goin with bungee cords and electricians tape-it’s serious.
If you ride like there’s no tomorrow-there won’t be.
Bikes parked out front mean good chicken-fried steak inside.
If you want to complain about the pace being set by the road captain, you better be prepared to lead the group yourself.
Gray-haired bikers don’t get that way from pure luck.
There are drunk bikers. There are old bikers. there are NO old, drunk bikers.
We don’t need no steenkin’ weekend warriors.
Thin leather looks good in the bar, but it won’t save you from "road rash" if you go down.
The best modifications cannot be seen from the outside.
Always replace the cheapest parts first.
You can forget what you do for a livin when your knees are in the breeze.
No matter what marque you ride, it’s all the same wind.
It takes both pistons and cylinders to make a bike run. One is not more important than the other
I saw you, hug your purse closer to you in the grocery store line.
But, you didn't see me, put an extra $10.00 in the collection plate last Sunday.
I saw you, pull your child closer when we passed each other on the sidewalk.
But, you didn't see me, playing Santa at the local mall.
I saw you, change your mind about going into the restaurant.
But, you didn't see me, attending a meeting to raise more money for the hurricane relief.
I saw you, roll up your window and shake your head when I drove by.
But, you didn't see me, driving behind you when you flicked your cigarette butt out the car window.
I saw you, frown at me when I smiled at your children.
But, you didn't see me, when I took time off from work to run toys to the homeless.
I saw you, stare at my long hair
.But, you didn't see me, and my friends cut ten inches off for Locks of Love.
I saw you, roll your eyes at our leather coats and gloves.
But, you didn't see me, and my brothers donate our old coats and gloves to those that had none.
I saw you, look in fright at my tattoos.
But, you didn't see me, cry as my children where born and have their name written over and in my heart.
I saw you, change lanes while rushing off to go somewhere.
But, you didn't see me, going home to be with my family.
I saw you, complain about how loud and noisy our bikes can be.
But, you didn't see me, when you were changing the CD and drifted into my lane.
I saw you, yelling at your kids in the car.
But, you didn't see me, pat my child's hands, knowing he was safe behind me.
I saw you, reading the newspaper or map as you drove down the road.
But, you didn't see me, squeeze my wife's leg when she told me to take the next turn.
I saw you, race down the road in the rain.
But, you didn't see me, get soaked to the skin so my son could have the car to go on his date.
I saw you, run the yellow light just to save a few minutes of time.
But, you didn't see me, trying to turn right.
I saw you, cut me off because you needed to be in the lane I was in.
But, you didn't see me, leave the road.
I saw you, waiting impatiently for my friends to pass.
But, you didn't see me. I wasn't there.
I saw you, go home to your family.
But, you didn't see me.
Because, I died that day you cut me off.
I was just a biker. A person with friends and a family.
But, you didn't see me.
Repost this around in hopes that people will understand the biker community.
If you don’t repost this, It sucks to be you. I hope you never loose someone that rides.
Have a great week my friends
-Your wife has ever asked you to move the bike so she could see the TV better.
- You have ever had to borrow a helmet for your date.
- Your best friends are named after reptiles.
- You own more black T-shirts then underwear. (Bikers wear underwear..humm didn't know that)
- Taking your wife on a cruise means a putt down the interstate.
- Sturgis is your dream vacation.
- You ever quit a job to go to Sturgis.
- You only took the job to pay for your trip to Sturgis.
- Your only three-piece suit is a leather jacket, leather vest and chaps.
- Your ol' lady can only eat a hot dog if it's suspended from a string above your bike.
- You buy your 3-year old niece a Harley Davidson t-shirt.
- You can identify bugs by taste.
- You think BLACK & ORANGE would make nice house colors.
- You think GOD invented winter just as a good time to get your bike painted.
- People know you’re a biker even when you don't want them to.
- One of your children or pets has either "Harley" or "Davidson" in their name.
- People have nearly died of starvation looking at all of your bike/run pictures.
- Over half the pictures you take have your bike in it.
- You stare longer at the pictures of the bikes in Easyriders than the naked women.
- You don't go a day without wearing something that says "Harley Davidson".
- The weather is too bad for riding and you start your bike and sit on it in the garage.
- You get hit by a car, break your leg, and then tell the nice police officer, "I'm fine I can ride home".
- You see no use in going to a bar without bikes in front.
- You dream of owning a Harley dealership.
- You have a refrigerator in the garage just for beer.
- You pile boxes and laundry on your car, but your bike must have 6 feet or clearance in the garage.
- Every time you hear a vehicle with headers you look for a Harley.
- When you plan a vacation you set up time to visit the bike shops first.
- You have all the tools to work on every Harley ever made, but not any to work on your ol’ lady’s car.
- It's impossible to see out of your car or trucks rear window because of all the Harley stickers.
- You refer to your bike as if it had a legal first name
- You have a heater in your garage so you can work on your bike(s) when it's cold.
- Your Christmas list has no words, just part numbers.
- Every magazine you subscribe to has the word "Biker" on it somewhere.
- One area of your house (other then the garage) is decorated in a motorcycle motif.
- Every time you spend money, you think about what you coulda bought for your bike.
- They celebrate your birthday at the Harley store.
- You think 'Helmet Hair' is a fashion statement.
- You encourage your kids to go to the Motorcycle Mechanic's Institute instead of college.
- Your dog and your wallet are both on chains.
- You fainted when you met Willie G.
- Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".
- You've spent more on your motorcycle than your Education
- You have at least one ashtray that is actually a motorcycle part.
- You think that the Harley-Davidson plant should be one of the 7-wonders of the world.
- When she says, "It's the bike or me!!" you have to think about it really hard.
- You spend more time polishing your bike than caressing your woman
- You have more locks on your bike than you do your house.
- Anyone who doesn't ride is just 'ok'.-You can think of least ten things left off this list.
Recently large demonstrations have taken place across the country protesting the fact that Congress is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration.
Certain people are angry that the US might protect its own borders, might make it harder to sneak into this country and, once here, to stay indefinitely.
Let me see if I correctly understand the thinking behind these protests.
Let's say I break into your house.
Let's say that when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave.
But I say, “No! I like it here. It's better than my house. I've made all the beds and washed the dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors. I've done all the things you don't like to do. I'm hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).”
According to the protesters:
You are required to let me stay in your house.
You are required to feed me.
You are required to add me to your family's insurance plan.
You are required to educate my kids.
You are required to provide other benefits to me & to my family (my husband will do all of your yard work because he is also hard-working and honest, except for that breaking in part).
If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my RIGHT to be there.
It's only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I'm just trying to better myself.
I'm a hard-working and honest, person, except for well, you know, I did break into your house. And what a deal it is for me!!!
I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of cold, uncaring, selfish, prejudiced, and bigoted behavior.
Oh yeah, I DEMAND you learn MY LANGUAGE so you can communicate with me.
Why can't people see how ridiculous this is?!
Only in America!
Share it if you see the value of it.
If not blow it off ... along with your future Social Security funds, and a lot of other things.
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