I went to Beijing last weekend. Had a humbling experience and a life lesson.
You know, sometimes you think you got it all, feeling superior 'cos you've got your dream bike, are part of the 'modern' world, computer, TV, books and magazines, day job behind a desk and the odd holiday... you know.. "things", posessions, appendages.
Until you come across some aspect of what makes us surviving humans, raw and face to face; Remenances of the basic instincts that over time get varnished and dressed, become politically acceptable behaviour that make us fuss over how we like our Martini, or how we want the Jeans to to look or the brands that we carry to express ourselves and introduce a character of ourselves and still somehow makes us dull.
well, I had a brush with it last weekend in Beijing market- went there for the weekend to meet a friend, had a Saturday all to myself before we met up that evening. First time in a long time, when I had no schedule, no where to be at lunch and no weekend choars.
Conciously decided against Star bucks (yes there was one there too!) I went to the local market and just spent the time to watch, as if for the first time, to REALLY see people, amongst the noise and colour of the small stalls selling anything from clothes to electronics, bubble pipes, copy designer bags, scarves and plates and Mao and buddah status in typical poses.
I concentrated on observing the individuals, one at a time, while they went about their business. you see in China you can do that without the whole experience being interrupted by the dreaded "what are you looking at?" line coming back at you. Not speaking the language helped with the mood, you feel entitled to obseve, to SEE.
There I saw the struggle for success- single minded determination of people, who without the secondary education, through sheer need and individual practice, addressed you in 3 languages, single mindedly focused on selling to you. Raw market like the 'old times', like it must have been 2000 years ago. The style was not learned in some 'workshop' through an instructor called Johnathan with undertones of sexual inclinations, it was basic NEED to succeed or secumb to the poverty, defeat and everything that goes with it. Don't get me wrong, it was not a desperate struggle, not needy pleading verging on begging, it was a determined practiced fighetr entering the arena, 'theater of operation', it was focused, committed and very sophisticated but stemed from an natural instinct, skills with the elegance that only trial and error of years akin to the Darwinian evelution would give you. It was elegant yet rustic.
Eighteen year old budding business woman who could read you, size you up, decide on an approach and go for it with the opening line, "you want ties? how about underpant? want a watch? rolex!" and from the first reply the game was on.. "here.. you will like this.. you are very handsome.. oh yes this really suites you.. how many do you want? I have this colour as well..." eyes searching you, no detail went un-noticed, "nice hands, your jacket is not from here..", and for every line of resistance quickly the strategy would change, slight change of angle, change of mood; "you have childeren? I have one, she is 7, do you want lighter?" then you haggle.. "why are you so mean, a rich man like you.. have 8.. lucky number.. give you a good price.. don't worry ...here.." as the goods were piled on your arms and then hands.. all the time the fixed stare and the smile.. if you looked hard enough you could see behind the dark eyes in the between the two thin lines of eye lids, calculating, focused.. focused and never loosing sight of the goal.
So, I had the time and followed the line, just to see where it would lead, a bit like fishing, slight pull, not hardf enough to break the line and not too slow to loose interest and give up.
Fourty minutes later, having traversed the full range of human emotions, from curiosity, to learning ("nee how" means hello.. "meyo" means disagree and wu sheu tua Nariman" means my name is nariman!- I think!), to sulking("you are killing me.. this is too cheap"),laughter and anger (you don't want to buy, you are just joking") and back again, fall out ("get out of my shop... o.k, come here, last price"), to make up and empathy ("how old your son?.. he will like this")..
Fourty minutes later I was the proud owner of 5 pairs of underpants (Calvin Cline knock offs !) at 50 cents a pair..(not bad, we started at $12! When I went in I did not even know I needed them! Shaking hands with now my "good friend"...
She will probably do the routine 50 times that day, to go home most likely on a bicycle in -3 degrees, peddaling 2 hours to outskirts of the town, to come back and do it all over again the next day, and the day after that.. 9 to 9. weekend? just another day to earn a living.
What left a lasting impression, like the warmth of a long hand-hold in a automn walk, was the sheer energy in the encounter, the raw drive, the committment 100% determination to 'deal'. THAT was fascinating and a lesson.. no self help books, no life cauch, no "cosmopolitan-10-ways-to-close-that-deal" article. You want a lesson on motivation, take a trip to the market.. I left feeling richer from the experience, humble at the memory of the days when I hesitated to get out of bed and face another day at my work, inspired by the solid character that wouldn't know- didn't need- the "seven habits of...", "Chicken soup for the soul" or daily dose of Operah and Dr Phil to feel 'centred'.
Here was a human who was intouch with the basic instincts of the 'hunt', tapping in to the well of natural surival strength effortlessly and at will like the muscle memory of a cat in fall...
I bought, a fighter pilot helmet (with drop down polariod!), cigar cutters and single steel cigar tube, 15 ties, a buddah a pocket tourch, 6 watches... but above all I think I learned how I want to be...! 100% present!
Tags: Nariman Beijing China
